Expectations

I see this is becoming a collection of sayings. But these sentences bring with me more meaning than I can put in many paragraphs. I will start writing again. So here we go again:

"Whatever you think you will be, you will always turn out to be something different." - Ajan Brahm from Buddha's scriptures

Happiness is Contagious

"Even if someone doesn't agree with you, they will smile too."

Just wanted to record it.

As is said

Mark Twain said (I think;)

"I have had lots of problems in my life; many of which never happened."

It Doesn't Matter ... So What?

I start with all the ambition in the world. Then I encounter insurmountable obstacles. I find myself missing things I can have, if only I decide to change course. I imagine what life would be if I just stopped now.

Does it matter that I succeed? I can always start over later. I might be better at something else. Irrespective of what others might think, I would probably be happier than I am now.

I don't have to succeed at anything, unless I have the I-have-to-do-something syndrome. That's right. It is my syndrome. In the bigger scheme of things, it doesn't matter. If I think it does, I should just strain my mind to look at a slightly bigger picture.

In hindsight, I might have as well not done what I am are doing. In fact, in REAL hindsight it doesn't really matter whatever I do. I could do nothing. Still it doesn't matter.

It never really matters.

Then, you ask, why do I continue to do what I am doing? To quote someone:

"Stay hungry; stay foolish."

Centre of the Universe?

Earth was the center of the universe. It was not scientifically. But it was for all out purposes, for we believed so. It was even decreed by religion. The first guy to think otherwise was considered crazy.

Fast forward.

Not much has changed in the Cosmos. But something profound has happened. Earth is not the center of the universe. We are looking at the truth. The first step to a better understanding of our own backyard.

There is another center we still believe in. This one is ever more closer and dearer to our hearts.

"I".

We spend so much time with this person that we believe that is the most important person in the world. We look through his/her eyes and think what we see is the world.

But, is this the truth?

He is a fine companion. But once in a while step back and try to look at the world from someone else's eyes. After all, there is more to the world than what he/she sees.

Internal Compass

Someone recently asked me what I would do if I found a million dollars in a bag on an empty street. I could not answer that question. What would I do? I might grab the bag and run. I might take it to the police or inform them about it. Or I might walk right past it.

But what would I really do?

A country went into the first world war, confident of its effective firing power, having heavily trained it soldiers. An investigation after the war revealed that majority of the bullets did not hit the enemy. It all boiled down to the fact that the excellent shooters just didn't shoot any human. They have never shot a human. They trained with a bull's eye and could not get themselves to shoot a real person.

Subsequently, the training program was restructured to shoot human figures or human-like objects. Now the soldiers are more willing to empty a whole magazine on anyone they come across.

If we can be trained to kill without thinking, can't we be trained to make the right choice without being emotionally moved by the moment? Our choice might not be universally true. But at least, we will do what we intend to.

Maybe we can be individuals with our own response to stimuli, not just a mob.

Writing to Write

I want to rewrite the whole thing. Every sentence seemed inadequate. The feeling I have after reading it -- "Did I write this?". On a positive note, "I can do better."

I am reading a technical article I had written two years back. The journal in which it is to be published has sent me proofs to verify. It was my first technical article. I was happy with my work when I first wrote it. It was even accepted in a refereed conference and was published.

I want to start over now. So many ideas inadequately brought out. A fragmented flow. Many assumptions left unexplained. But I was only allowed to make minor changes in the proof.

I am upset. But I am happy too.

For the first time, I can see how my writing has improved. I can see how I wrote two years back. I know what I lacked then as well. I did not strive -- "I should improve my writing." In every article, I tried to communicate better -- "What do I want to say? How do I say it?" And I am happy with the outcome.

Now I know what I should do to improve my general writing skills. Just write. I have heard many say "Rome was not built in a day." I have always known what they meant. But, now I am beginning to see it. It is my theory now, not someone else's.

So here I am, writing.

Star Wars

I watched Star Wars today. I love science-fiction movies. But this is more than a dumb gun-'em-all movie. Do not get drowned in the special effects. Listen to the words. Some of the finest knowledge has been distilled into it. It brings out the fine distinctions between darkness and light.

Listen to Darth Sidious. Jedis and the Siths are the same, almost. One group is selfless, and the other is driven by passion and greed. Such a fine line, it is. In a world with no absolutes, both are right. The world as Anakin sees it.

The film comprises many themes relevant in today's politically-charged climate.

Anakin a.k.a Darth Vader declares, "If you are not with me, you are my enemy."
Obi-wan tries to reason with him, "Only a Sith sees in absolutes."

We have heard this many times over -- "If you are not with us, you are against us." We cheer 'em on. As the Queen of Naboo observes, "I guess this is how liberty is lost, over a round of applause."

The deal with the devil is always sweet. The reality then dawns.

What do you see?

A few days back, I went to a zoo. I was looking at the ensemble of reptiles from all over the world. The cages were well-lit and custom designed for each animal. They were cleaner than most houses I have seen. There was no trace of any left-overs from lunch. It looked like the animals never had nature's call.

Some of them were moving lazily. Most did not care to move. Why would they? These kings did not have much work to do! They were fed on-time. Their prey is served exclusively for them. Once served, their "food" cannot leave their kingdom. Once done with their meal (or snack depending upon their culinary tastes and appetite), their mansions were cleaned for them. And they did not have to pay for any of these services. What a life! I was not sure if anyone could ask for more.

As I was walking, I found a giant snake lying in a small pool of water. So, it had a spa too! Straining to learn more about this fine gentleman, I read the description. It said:

"... spends most of its time underwater."

This guy must have been unhappy. For someone accustomed to mermaids, this terrestrial mansion must have been a little uncomfortable.

Feeling sorry for our big fellow, I moved on to visit our next gentleman. He was quite long, measuring five or six feet. He had two companions. The cage was not large enough cage for the three of them. They could have used more space.

I was not feeling as happy about their designer homes anymore. They all seemed crammed into a small artificial environment. A ten-year-old asked his dad how they must be feeling. His father explained:

"They must be feeling very lonely."

They had to pay for those services, after all.

Heaven in sight

It was cloudy and drizzling. Not being in any hurry, I was just ambling home. Some twenty feet ahead of me, there was a guy and a girl. They were looking eastward with their backs facing me. After looking a few moments, the couple kissed each other and looked at each other with dreamy eyes. By now used to this, I continue walking homeward.

To my right was a grey SUV approaching me. The girls in the car slowed down and kept looking back at the couple. Suddenly the car stopped; right in the middle of the road! Three girls got out of the SUV and started jumping and screaming.

It was a rainbow!

Right ahead of me. It was the most perfect rainbow I have ever seen. It was a complete rainbow in all its glory. I could see it almost fully from one end to another. I did not take my eyes off it till I reached home. It was magical.

It was staring at me and I wouldn't have noticed it, but for three screaming girls. I will not forget to look up at the sky from tomorrow. Who knows what I might find!